Complicated Grief

There are several names for recognized grief disorders, including prolonged grief disorder and complicated grief disorder. The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-V) most recently added prolonged (complicated) grief disorder as an official psychiatric diagnosis, according to the Los Angeles Times, giving people suffering from debilitating grief a name for the disorder.

Prolonged Grief Disorder

Prolonged grief disorder affects some people more frequently than others. According to a paper published in the Oncology Nursing Forum, people who suffer from prolonged grief disorder often have a family history of the disorder. Women tend to suffer from prolonged grief disorder more often than men, though some men have the disorder as well. Typically, prolonged grief disorder is diagnosed at around six months after the causal traumatic event. This study also showed that African Americans are 2.5 times more likely to have the disorder.

Complicated Grief Disorder

Though the new psychiatric name for complicated grief disorder has been changed to prolonged grief disorder, the concept of complicated grief is still very appropriate. Research conducted by the Columbia University School of Social Work estimates that nearly 10 percent of all bereaved people develop complicated grief. This type of grief occurs when the normal feelings of grief after a traumatic event don’t begin to fade. Those suffering from complicated grief are in the same type of emotional pain months after an event as they were the day the trauma occurred.
The above was taken from psychguides.com and serves to reflect my continued research into why I cannot move forward, why things continue to hold me back and why I continue to feel a deep sense of impending doom.  I remain hopeful that someone has figured this out.  
Unfortunately grief is a deeply personal experience and has left me filled with depression and anxiety.  I am terrified and sad all the time.  I am not sleeping well often waking up to tears or a feeling of impending doom.  Recent articles have indicated that chronicling those feelings might prove helpful so I have started this blog to try to come to grips with my feelings.
I have had multiple devastating panic attacks with little or no basis in fact and I cannot seem to move past them.  They haunt my everyday existence as reminders of things that could happen crippling my ability to focus on other things.  My mind is often consumed with the elements of those panic attacks even if the facts do not support them as actual events.  I wish I could move past them.  I sincerely do.
I see my psychologist tomorrow and will certainly discuss my mind’s inability to accept the emperical evidence as fact choosing instead to focus on the visions in the panic attack as factual.  
I deeply hope no one else has to endure this reality.  It is a terrible place to exist and to try to navigate.  If you are here, seek help.  This is a difficult place to exist.
Stan